Leopold's Birth Story Part 1

So I have mentioned a few times on this blog that I had quite a traumatic birth experience with my first and that I am planning a natural, "healing" birth this time around, but I have not actually told the story of what lead me to have PTSD and to want a very different birth.
First time pregnant mummas, I really advise you don't read on. Of course, my idea of what is traumatic may differ dramatically from yours, but I never liked hearing the negative birth stories while pregnant so completely understand if you feel the same.


I really want to write this story down in full, partially for anyone interested in reading it, but also for my benefit as I have often avoided retelling it. Warning; this will be a long blog entry.

Pregnancy:

I fell pregnant when I was 19 years old. Although bubs wasn't exactly planned, he was not a surprise either.
I carried very big in my first pregnancy (I will post a series of photos at the end of this blog post), at the time a larger than average baby was suspected to be the cause, but we now know I had a lot more fluid than most people have. I showed early and just kept getting bigger. I had little to no morning sickness and to be honest I really loved being pregnant. I loved my bump, I loved my bigger breasts. I loved the feeling of growing my child within me and how womanly that was.
Unfortunately in my first trimester I did some ligament damage at work (I was a childcare worker) and as my pregnancy progressed and my ligaments stretched this damage got worse and worse. By 20 weeks I was in constant pain and had started regular physio. I also had issues with sciatica.
Despite this, things progressed well and both bubs and I were healthy. I had a low lying placenta that moved up by 32 weeks and was not an issue. I gained 14kg all up, the maximum weight gain for someone of my height and felt every kilo of it.
At 32 weeks I started having very regular and quite painful contractions. The hospital suspected I was in early labour and we had to discuss some very frightening options of what would happen if Leo arrived so prematurely. Thankfully everything stopped on it's own and that was our only real scare the entire pregnancy.
My doctor was sure that a) baby would be big and b) I wouldn't make it to 40 weeks. At 37 weeks pregnant Leopold went from being fully engaged to transverse so our birth plans changed completely. Now considered 'high risk' due to baby's position and my doctor's fear of him being an ill fit for my pelvis I was going to have to deliver at the bigger hospital near us, as opposed to the small, local one that had been my first choice.

Labour: Part 1-

Despite my doctor's predictions I was nearly 40 weeks pregnant and very much fed up. For the last 10 days I had been experiencing regular, but bearable contractions. I wanted them to either go away entirely or amp up and neither of these things seemed to be happening. The night before my EDD I accepted that he would not be arriving any time soon and enjoyed a lovely night with G's family, laughing lots and eating good food.
I went to bed at around 11pm that night feeling tired and happy. At 4.30am I awoke to a very big contraction. I got up to go to the bathroom and realised I had lost my plug (actually the second time I had lost it during pregnancy) and had my 'bloody show'. Suddenly I was very aware that I would be having this baby, and soon, and my nerves really set in. Crying and scared I woke G up to let him know that things were happening. I had another contraction at 4.45am and decided to call my MIL to tell her what was going on. She was very excited and told me to give the midwives a quick call to ask their advice. After being informed by the midwife to rest while I could, I hopped back into bed nervous and excited and got a couple of hours broken sleep between 5am and 7am, contracting every 15 minutes or so.
G called into work in the morning to let them know he would be staying home with me. It was Monday the 20th of June 2011, my EDD and we relaxed at home all day, pottering around and getting some things finished like packing my hospital bag and cleaning. My contractions gradually got closer together and stronger. MIL brought over some lunch at around noon and I was contracting every 8 minutes or so, but still able to talk through them. To be honest I think we were all a bit more excited than we should have been and thought that my contractions would be helping me progress well regardless of how strong (or in this case 'weak') they were. I was determined to stay home until I felt Leo turn from transverse, the one thing I was sure of was that I did not want a c section, and after an hour or so of time spent crawling around on my hands and knees I felt him make one big turn and settle into my pelvis.
At 4pm we decided to go get checked out at our local hospital to ensure his heart rate was good and that I was still contracting regularly. The hospital confirmed everything was fine and the contractions were coming every 4 minutes. They were getting a little more painful now, but still not really that strong. We went to MIL's house with the plan to hang out for awhile and have a nice dinner then head from there to the hospital when they were coming every 3 minutes or so.

Birth story to be continued...

13 weeks

20 weeks

23ish weeks

37 weeks

39 weeks

35 Week Update

We had our growth scan last week and everything looks perfect with our little man. Definitely no IUGR issues so yay! He is measuring steadily along the 34th percentile and his estimated weight was 5lbs/2.3kg. I think if I go to 40+ weeks he will be a bit bigger than Leo, but still in the 7lb range. I have a feeling he may arrive earlier though :)
His head is measuring a lot bigger, but as Leopold was a big headed babe that does not surprise me in the slightest. Every day that goes by I am getting more and more excited to give birth and meet our beautiful bubba. I definitely need every one of the weeks I have left to get things ready for his arrival, but I am more excited than nervous.

Squishy Bub at 34w4d gestation. Look at those pouty lips!

35w1d

How far along?: 35 weeks
Total weight gain: +6.5kg from pre-pregnancy weight
Maternity clothes?: Not really, still squeezing in to all my normal clothes
Stretch marks?: No new ones surprisingly!
Sleep: It's not always comfy, but I seem to be getting enough
Best moment this week: Our growth scan results being all good and of course seeing Squishy Bub again
Miss Anything?: I miss not being pregnant! I'm still trying to enjoy it, but this is the hard bit now
Movement: I definitely don't experience movements slowing down like a lot of women do at the end of pregnancy, still as strong as ever
Food cravings: Cocoa Pops this week
Anything making you queasy or sick: Early mornings
Gender: Boy
Labour Signs:I get a very "real" contraction every day or so. It's intense and I need to breathe through it, it last about 1.5 minutes and builds to a peak then dies off just like a normal contraction. I have faith it's just my body preparing itself for birth and things are slowly happening
Symptoms: Pelvic issues are still causing me some grief. And my acid reflux/heartburn is awful, but an easier week this week
Belly Button in or out?: Outie all the way!
Engagement ring on or off?: On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Sore, sore and happy
Looking forward to: Wearing my Blackmilk clothing again haha

Birth Plan

Thought I would post my birth plan for anyone who is curious. We are planning a very natural, healing birth and hopefully everything will go smoothly.

Birth Plan // Wishes List

I wish for these people to remain with me/the baby throughout the labour and delivery unless stated otherwise by me.

Thank-you for the care you have provided for my baby and I so far. We understand that birth and the post birth period can be unpredictable, however, we would like you as the care providers to respect and support the following as closely as possible.

LABOUR:

• Other than medical staff, and my support team, I do not want any other family or friends to enter the birthing room at any stage of labour, delivery, or post partum unless stated otherwise by me. 
• I would like to have suggested to me all forms of natural pain relief throughout my labour, I would like to be encouraged by all your staff to try all natural forms of pain relief you know of and can use. 
• I would like to have an active labour, possibly using TENS and I am agreeable to using the gas if required.
• Under no circumstances do I want to be offered pethidine! 
• I would like to keep as active as I wish to be, during labour to help me through the contractions. To ensure this I want to be free from any monitors and/or IV lines throughout my labour and birth. Unless I become dehydrated. 
• I would like the environment to be kept as quiet as possible, with dimmed lighting.
• I would like to be reminded to eat, drink and empty my bladder.
• I would prefer that vaginal examinations are kept to a minimum, and that permission is sought from me before all procedures. This applies even if procedures are routine such as blood pressure, temp taking etc.
• I want to be given maximum time for decision-making and for staff to leave the room while all decisions are being made. Once I have come to a decision, at some points I may ask my partner G or (other support person) to voice my decisions for me.
• I do not want an internal monitor unless the baby have shown some sign of distress.
• I would prefer that no students are present at either my labour or birth.
• I would like my amniotic sac to be allowed to rupture on its own. 
• I would like photos to be taken during labour and the birth especially in the event of intervention eg caesarean section etc., which (OSP) or my partner G will take for us. 
• I often find water is a great pain reliever for me and would like to use this option whether it is a bath or shower as much as possible. Even a wet face washer or ice blocks to crunch on. 

DELIVERY: 

• I would like to deliver our baby in a position of my choosing including a shower birth if possible.
• I do not want to be in the position on my back to deliver the baby as this position in general is extremely uncomfortable for me, and leads to fainting and vomiting. 
• I would like to be reminded that I can touch our baby as he/she is born.
• I would like our baby to be placed on my chest immediately after birth. 
• I would like to assist if the delivery of my baby (if my chosen delivery position allows).

EPISIOTOMY:

• I would prefer not to have an episiotomy.

IMMEDIATE POST-DELIVERY:

• The cord is to be cut only after it stops pulsating. And I would like the cord to be cut by my partner G.
• I would like a physiological third stage and for the baby to remain on me during this stage.
• We would like the baby to remain with us while his/her checks are performed.
• We decline the Hep B vaccination as we wish to wait until our baby is two months old before it is administered.

POST-PARTUM:

• Unless absolutely necessary we do not wish to be separated from our baby. If for some reason it does become necessary, please allow my partner G to remain with our baby at all times while he/she is away from me. 

BREASTFEEDING:

• I wish to breastfeed in recovery and do not want my baby to receive formula.
• I wish to use the baby led attachment method of breastfeeding. And am open to help and assistance if available. 

CAESAREAN:

• Unless it is absolutely necessary I would like to avoid a caesarean.
• If unavoidable I wish to be fully informed and involved in all decision making.
• I would like G to be present at all times. 
• I would like a running commentary of the surgery process.
• I would like the screen to be lowered as our baby is born so that I can view the birth.
• I would like the birth to be recorded with photos and video.
• If there is no contraindication I would like the baby to be given to me immediately after the birth.
• Our baby is to be kept unwiped and placed on either mine or G’s chest for skin-to-skin contact as soon as possible.
• I would like the baby to remain with us while I am being stitched.
• I wish to breastfeed in recovery and do not want my baby to receive formula.
• We strongly request to not be separated from our baby. If it’s absolutely necessary then we wish for G to be with our baby and for our OSP, to remain with me until I am transferred to the postnatal ward. 

33 & 34 Week Update

Oh my gosh where to begin! So much has happened the last two weeks.
Well, I am 34w2d today (seriously?!!!) and feeling every one of those weeks. The last month or so I have been having pelvic issues, lots of pain, tenderness and trouble with mobility. Finally get in to see a physio (actually the same physio I saw during my first pregnancy) and what do you know? My pelvis has almost completely seperated and become unstable. So lots of exercises and physical therapy for me! And I have to wear a special pelvic belt. Hopefully we can minimise the damage done and help the pain, but I'm looking at a 6-12 month recovery post-partum so need to take it very easy. How easy can one take it when they have a toddler and newborn? I guess I'll find out!

Also my doctor is a wee bit concerned about Squishy Bub's growth so we're off for another growth scan this week. I have suspected bubs is small, and last growth scan he was measuring 30th percentile (I'm very aware ultrasounds can be inaccurate in estimating size), but my doc is worried he isn't growing effectively and dropping percentiles. If that's the case I will be looking at regular monitoring and possible early induction. That really scares me. A) Because I feel like I need every single one of the weeks I have left to prepare for bubba's arrival and b) because I want a very natural birth experience this time around and am worried how an induction will effect that. Of course,  a healthy baby is my main priority, but I hate this unknown element. Everyone please cross your fingers for me that it all looks good and Squishy is growing. I'll be sure to update here as soon as I know :)

33 weeks (and poking his bum out!)

34 weeks

34 weeks

How far along?: 33-34 weeks
Total weight gain: +5-6kg from pre-pregnancy weight (huge gain the last fortnight!!)
Maternity clothes?: Just bought so super daggy trackies. Hells yes!
Stretch marks?: Oldies definitely more visible, but no new ones *yet*
Sleep: Not too bad suprisingly
Best moment this week: The birth of a good friend's baby boy (early yesterday morning). I'm so happy for her and so excited! But also really nervous now because that means of all the preggos I know IRL I'm next eek!
Miss Anything?: Being able to eat without heartburn
Movement: Very, very painful now. He's strong even if he is little!
Food cravings: Cucumber sandwiches! I really, really want one. Now. Please
Anything making you queasy or sick: The sight of my untoned thighs is not pleasant
Gender: Boy
Labour Signs: The last 24 hours, just quietly, yes. But I think we're still awhile away (well I HOPE we are) from anything serious happening.
Symptoms: Pelvic issues, heartburn/reflux, nausea, constant need to wee, fatigue, Braxton Hicks contractions...you name it I have it!
Belly Button in or out?: Cute little outie :)
Engagement ring on or off?: On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Still happy, but going to be totally honest, I'm getting a little over it now haha
Looking forward to: Being able to kick a ball around the yard with Leopold again

32 Week Update

32 weeks was always going to be a nerve wracking week for me. I went into early labour with Leo at 32 weeks (thankfully it stopped, but was very scary!) and my youngest niece was born at 32 weeks in December 2011 (she is now a healthy and happy toddler ^-^), but so far so good :)
I had thought that bubs might have turned breech yesterday, but today I am feeling hiccups very low so fingers crossed he is staying put head down!

32 weeks

 How far along?: 32 weeks

Total weight gain: +3.5-4kg from pre-pregnancy weight
Maternity clothes?: This cooler weather is awesome! Lots of leggings and baggy jumpers for me. Bras are so uncomfy though, I want to be braless 24/7 haha
Stretch marks?:32 weeks was when I got my first stretch marks with Leo, but so far no new ones
Sleep: I'm in a bad sleep routine right now. MUST NOT STAY UP PAST 11pm!!
Best moment this week: Getting a cute little video of Squishy bub doing his ninja thing. 
My best moment this week is not pregnancy related though. We have officially started inspecting houses to look for our first family home :) Very exciting!
Miss Anything?: I am having a real craving for a new tattoo right now...
Movement: Had the odd quite day, but he is super active at night
Food cravings: None at the moment. Lots of foods I feel like, but no strong cravings
Anything making you queasy or sick: Woke up choking on my acid reflux the other morning. That was pretty gross. Pregnancy is so glamourous hey?
Gender: Boy
Labour Signs: Actually yes this week! But thinking it's just because 32 weeks is my 'bad' week. Nothing too worrying though
Symptoms: Still the yucky heartburn/acid reflux. My pelvis hates me right now too. Oh and nesting this week! Nothing is clean enough for me
Belly Button in or out?: Nearly fully popped now, so not used to having an outie
Engagement ring on or off?: On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy, I'm always happy :)
Looking forward to: Being able to do the dishes without hitting my belly on the sink

30 & 31 Week Update

Well as you can see we had our second 4d scan ^_^ Our beautiful little man is chubby, healthy and has lots of hair apparently! I love the first pic where you can see his cheeky little smile, I'm so curious to meet him and see what he looks like in real life! Not long now, we're in the final stretch and as tough as this pregnancy has been I know I am going to miss it.

I don't have any particularly great belly pics from these two weeks, I'll take a better one tomorrow when I hit 32 weeks!

30 Weeks, being photobombed :)

31w5d, feeling heavy and low

How far along?: 30-31 weeks

Total weight gain: +3.5kg from pre-pregnancy weight (really stacking it on now!)
Maternity clothes?: I really hate wearing clothes at the moment, leggings and baggy jumpers are as dressy as I get. But I am not in maternity clothes, pretty much just wearing my normal stuff still, but they don't look as nice as they used to. And I can still fit my denim shorts yay!
Stretch marks?: My old ones are becoming a bit purple/pink. Moisturising does nothing, if you are going to get them you will get them, but I'm addicted to the smell of cocoa butter haha.
Sleep: Except for my heartburn keeping me awake, sleeping well.
Best moment this week: Our 4d scan was AMAZING! Really wish I had gotten one with Leo :( Oh and we think bubs looks like me! Considering Leo is such a clone of his dad I'm very excited to find out for sure. 
Miss Anything?: Deli foods, I really want salami and feta. And beer. I can't wait to enjoy a beer.
Movement: Super ninja baby as per usual. He is getting very low now!
Food cravings: Fairy bread lately, but haven't gotten any yet. Still enjoying my smoothies, but not really craving them.
Anything making you queasy or sick: My acid reflux. And sometimes I'm nauseous when I first get up.
Gender: Boy
Labour Signs: No
Symptoms: Acid reflux/heartburn and my pelvic pain is getting pretty bad. I think he *might* be engaging!
Belly Button in or out?: Top half is officially popped!
Engagement ring on or off?: On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy, but tired.
Looking forward to: Labour! Haha.

And the proof, a little mini me?? Perhaps, only time will tell :)

Leopold Update

I haven't been posting about my beautiful not-so-baby boy much lately, but I have definitely not forgotten him. He makes every day such a joy (an exhausting joy) and although I am so excited for him to be a big brother, the thought of him not being my one and only does make me a little sad. So I've been enjoying and making the most of all this one on one time with lots of cuddles, sleepy breast feeds, baths together and getting up to all kinds of fun ^-^

Leo will be 21 months on the 21st of this month (seriously where has the time gone?!), he is still a little skinny mini not weighing quite 10kg yet and is about 85cm long. He has all his teeth except his 2 year old molars (his canines all just cut at once and man was that fun -_-).
He is sleeping pretty well at the moment, usually about 8.30pm until 7.30am, although occasionally wakes once or twice which I am hoping is just teething. He naps for about 2 hours, 11.30-1.30ish. I take the opportunity to nap too haha!

He loves bath time, 'Finding Nemo', animals, sultanas, reading lots and lots of stories, giving cuddles ("cuggles") and kisses ("disses"), "boobies", playing in his sandpit, sushi and 'In The Night Garden' ("Garden"). He is a very talkative, verbal little man. We've lost track of the amount of words and sentences he says regularly, but he seems to be learning new ones every day. Today's new word was "pillow" :)
He's very gentle, not a rough and tumble toddler at all, and although he can be quite attached to me I have to admit I love the constant hugs. We practice gentle/peaceful parenting with him and I am sure that that is one of the reasons he is very non aggressive and responsive to us.
I really hope he'll be caring with bubs and know he is going to grow into a sweet little man and big brother.

I could not be more proud of him or more in love. Sure, he drives me crazy some days, toddlers are NOT easy. But he is beautiful, inside and out <3